Finding Power in the Power Struggle: Teen vs. Parent

The parent vs. teen power struggle is a burning sensation that we will all feel at one point. Your teen can get on your nerves. And you can get on your teen’s nerves. When the tensions build, interacting with your teen can feel impossible. It can be extremely easy to lash out and blame your child or dismiss them for being overdramatic. While this is easy, it is not effective.

Developing a sense of understanding and connection with your teen is critical for surviving the teenage years. Talking with other parents or getting outside advice on ways to address the disconnect is a great starting place. Below are a few more tips that can help you seek a healthy relationship with your teen.

  1. Channel your inner-teen. Recall your own teenage experiences. This can help you to better identify with your teen’s growing pains. Read books or articles from a teenage perspective. These are great resources for helping you better understand what your teen is going through. We tend to mark teens as being dramatic. It’s easy to deem their problems as insignificant or just not that serious. But that’s not true. Teens are learning how to deal with conflict, set boundaries, achieve goals, make sense of their thoughts and emotions and figure out who they are. By showing empathy and a sense of understanding of their feelings, they will learn that you genuinely care about them and their life.
  2. Open the door. Literally. Let your teen know you are there for them and that your door is always open. Creating the open line of communication with your child helps significantly strengthen your bond.
  3. Take a break from giving advice and get some. Talk to your teen about something you’re struggling with. Ask for their input. Let them be a part of your challenges too. This is a great way to show them you value their input. It also shows them that talking about things can be helpful and that no one has it all together. Plus, your teen may offer a perspective on your own issue that you never considered. It’s a win-win situation.
  4. Find fun together. Identify an activity that you and your teen both enjoy doing. Make time for this activity throughout the week. Sometimes sitting face-to-face to talk can be tiring an overwhelming. Doing an enjoyable activity can reinforce that you value each other’s company and it can be a great way to let out stress. The activity can be something simple like riding bikes, playing tennis, gardening, or cooking.

blueFire Wilderness Therapy can help

blueFire Wilderness Therapy is an adventure-based program for adolescents ages 11-17 who struggle with mental health issues. This program uses the wilderness experience to teach students new skills and how to apply them to their everyday lives. There is a strong focus on learning effective communication skills, conflict-resolution skills, and improving self-confidence and self-reliance. blueFire gives students the opportunity to regain self-awareness and incorporate healthy activities back into their lives. We can help your family today!

Contact us @ 1-844-413-1999

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Kathy Rex

As long as I can remember the outdoors has been a place that fills my soul with happiness, clarity, peace, inspiration, and connections. Connecting with Mother Nature is powerful and never disappoints, even when hardships are a part of that process. Sitting peacefully in any outdoor setting witnessing even the slightest hint of survival (think of that lone flower that grows out of a rock in the middle of a desert) is my life source and reminds me how precious and our lives are, and how resilient we can be. Having shared experiences with others in the outdoors brings me such joy! My introduction to Wilderness Therapy came at a time when I, myself, was at a crossroads in life. Being witness to the reunification of children with their parents after being apart for several weeks was hands down the most miraculous thing I had ever witnessed. Weeks later, after packing my car with all my belongings, and my then 2 year old son, we ventured out to the deserts of southcentral Idaho to embark on a journey that I have never looked back from. The power and value of that parent-child connection has always been at the core of what has driven me in my home and in my work. My children and grandchildren are pretty remarkable too. What I learned early on, and continue to learn, is that change is hard…..and necessary. We have to be able to be honest with ourselves, listen to others, communicate effectively, and continually make decisions which are based on the best information available to us at the time. One cannot hide from themselves for long when they learn to sit still, observe, and then take action. Trust, Reliance, Vulnerability, Humility, Sacrifice, Acceptance, Confidence, Honesty, etc. The list goes on and on as far as what one is capable of experiencing in a wilderness setting. Since 1989 I have had many wonderful opportunities to be able to guide young people on their own journeys while enjoying the outdoors. Seeing the joy and eye-popping realization of one’s own value and capabilities is what drives me to stay involved in the work I do on a daily basis. Families embarking on this journey together is miraculous and inspiring. SouthCentral Idaho provides the perfect landscape for this amazing opportunity. Wilderness Therapy is my calling.

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